It's my very good friend, KT's, birthday today. KT and I have known each other since Secondary 1 at Raffles Girls'. Without revealing our age, let's just say it's been a long time since we knew each other.
I cannot even begin to say how much I treasure her friendship.
She and her mom helped me through one of the roughest patches in my life. That was a time when I was having family problems and was constantly thinking up ways to stay away from home. As fate would have it, we were staying very close to each other, and KT never failed to invite me to her place for lunch and stayed on to do homework.
Her mom never asked why but I think she kind of got used to her daughter's classmate who was becoming a regular at her place.
Their home was my refuge. Her friendship kept me strong.
Thankfully, I overcame that period and am now happily married with children of my own. On my wedding day, KT was also my "bridesmaid", even though she no longer qualified then because well, she was already married! I wouldn't have it any other way.
Even now after I've shifted to China, the two of us still met up whenever I'm back in Singapore. And kept each other in the loop of things with our blogs.
There's this saying that people come into your life for a reason, season or lifetime. But for KT, I think, she was my friend for a reason, a season and definitely for this lifetime.
Happy birthday, my dearest friend. May everyday be a joy for you.
31 March 2009
11 March 2009
Checking
It was homework time in the evening and I was looking through Zern's Math homework book.
Me: Zern, you see the note from your teacher here? You've been making careless mistakes.
Zern: Yeah...
Me: You should check your work after you do it and before handing in.
Zern: Oh...
Then, I went blah blah blah to explain each mistake and how he could have avoided it.
As I set about preparing dinner, I left instructions for him to complete his next Math homework and to check it as well. Twenty minutes later, Zern was still looking glumly at his homework sheet.
Me: So, did you check your work after you've done it?
Zern: Why should I?
Me: Why not? How else can you avoid careless mistakes?
Zern (almost teary): But why? I thought this is the teacher's job.
Me: ......
Can someone please help me fill in the blanks?
Me: Zern, you see the note from your teacher here? You've been making careless mistakes.
Zern: Yeah...
Me: You should check your work after you do it and before handing in.
Zern: Oh...
Then, I went blah blah blah to explain each mistake and how he could have avoided it.
As I set about preparing dinner, I left instructions for him to complete his next Math homework and to check it as well. Twenty minutes later, Zern was still looking glumly at his homework sheet.
Me: So, did you check your work after you've done it?
Zern: Why should I?
Me: Why not? How else can you avoid careless mistakes?
Zern (almost teary): But why? I thought this is the teacher's job.
Me: ......
Can someone please help me fill in the blanks?
08 March 2009
Many little things....
This has been a week of many little things. Just felt that time passed by so quickly. And it's like I've been quite busy. But busy with what? Well, let me think…
Oh yes, I decided to be more active in the boys' school. And ended up as Secretary (and now helping to do the Newsletter too) for the Friends of Dulwich Committee. It's been meetings twice a week, so much so that my friends ask why are you always in school? Really, I've been taking the boys' school bus so many times - since I don't have transport of my own - it's almost like I am ALSO going to school!
Managed to come up with the first newsletter and that took a bit of juggling. It was finally released yesterday and pleasantly surprised by the response to it. Makes me miss writing. Supposed this is one way to fulfil my urge to write.
Secondly, been more active with yoga...To cut a long story short, the gym I go to doesn't offer yoga lessons as before (Or in other words, you have to pay more to get them). Because I was a regular gym goer, I managed to earn a free one-month yoga card, so trying to maximise that.
Which brings me to the third thing...being ill. Well, feeling "unwell" is more like it. I've been nursing this stuffy/sometimes runny nose for 2 weeks now. It just won't go away. I continued exercising, which may have excerbated it. So, resting now and have stopped all exercise for 4 days. It's getting better, it seems. But of course, it also means my free-one-month of yoga is now not maximised!
Haha. It's a case of all the best plans in the world can go awry.
Keeping fingers crossed, because not exercising also means I feel lethargic easily. Or I end up being in front of the PC a lot more!
Reading more too. It's Dale Carnegie's "Stop Worrying and Start Living". SL was saying how I worry too much and lo and behold, this book appeared. So, started on it and got it going. Last night, also started reading to the boys at night. Keane is a worrier, like me. I hope this book will rub off on him, just as it did on me.
Well, that's about all for now. Better stop before my shoulders start aching from the incessant typing.
Ciao.
Oh yes, I decided to be more active in the boys' school. And ended up as Secretary (and now helping to do the Newsletter too) for the Friends of Dulwich Committee. It's been meetings twice a week, so much so that my friends ask why are you always in school? Really, I've been taking the boys' school bus so many times - since I don't have transport of my own - it's almost like I am ALSO going to school!
Managed to come up with the first newsletter and that took a bit of juggling. It was finally released yesterday and pleasantly surprised by the response to it. Makes me miss writing. Supposed this is one way to fulfil my urge to write.
Secondly, been more active with yoga...To cut a long story short, the gym I go to doesn't offer yoga lessons as before (Or in other words, you have to pay more to get them). Because I was a regular gym goer, I managed to earn a free one-month yoga card, so trying to maximise that.
Which brings me to the third thing...being ill. Well, feeling "unwell" is more like it. I've been nursing this stuffy/sometimes runny nose for 2 weeks now. It just won't go away. I continued exercising, which may have excerbated it. So, resting now and have stopped all exercise for 4 days. It's getting better, it seems. But of course, it also means my free-one-month of yoga is now not maximised!
Haha. It's a case of all the best plans in the world can go awry.
Keeping fingers crossed, because not exercising also means I feel lethargic easily. Or I end up being in front of the PC a lot more!
Reading more too. It's Dale Carnegie's "Stop Worrying and Start Living". SL was saying how I worry too much and lo and behold, this book appeared. So, started on it and got it going. Last night, also started reading to the boys at night. Keane is a worrier, like me. I hope this book will rub off on him, just as it did on me.
Well, that's about all for now. Better stop before my shoulders start aching from the incessant typing.
Ciao.
19 February 2009
My other half
It's my husband SL's birthday today.
No presents. No special plans. But he's taken leave from work today, so we're gonna have lunch together, after I go to the hairdresser's and aerobics and run some other errands...
We've been like this for a long long time - keeping birthdays, wedding anniversaries, Valentines', Christmases etc low key. Not making them more special than other days if we can help it.
I suppose, it kind of ties in with our "inherently rebellious" nature. Friends who know us long enough know we always try to break convention. We try not to make a big deal out of one day. It wasn't a custom we agreed on years ago but something that we just grew to be. Perhaps we both feel it feels hypocritical when you are nice to one another for one day and are not for the rest of the year.
We are also one of the most "vocal" couples we know. We do not hide our anger/dissatisfaction with each other. Not even in front of his parents, groups of friends etc. No face given, sometimes, you know. To the extent that SL actually thanked me in his uni thesis for it, for being his quote-"sparring partner" unquote. Yep, we two love a good fight or war of words. It's our drama hook, I think.
All said and done, I always ask myself this question: "If given a second chance, would I marry this guy again?"
The answer, inevitably, is yes.
Not because he's the best-looking, nor the most loving, nor the intellectually charming type which I adore, etc etc.... (I'd better not go on, else it'd really ruin his birthday. HeeHee)
But the only reason, I think, it's because he suits me best. And I, hopefully, am the one who also suit him most.
Like my economics-trained good friend Vivien used to say, marriage is like a barter trade, with a double coincidence of wants and needs. It's tough to trade. Tougher to stay trading.
So happy birthday Dear. May we enjoy our many more sparrings in future.
12 February 2009
Long overdue
This is long overdue. Saw that I haven't updated for a while. So here goes....
During the CNY break, was home in Singapore for 2 weeks. I especially enjoyed my gals-only gathering with four of my secondary school friends from RGS days. One of them wrote about the gathering in her own blog http://kwaitheng.blogspot.com/2009/02/daughters-of-better-age.html, which saved me the trouble...heehee.
In between, we also squeezed in a trip to Penang. Very short and very enjoyable, thanks to the great hospitality of friends BL and LL and their families. SL still raves about the prawn noodles, chendol and durians from Cameron Highlands...
After that, busy for another one and half weeks as the boys settled back to school and us to our normal routines...which reminds me, I've got many other things to do. So that's the latest from us....until I find the time to blog again :P.
19 January 2009
To test or not to test
The boys had their piano exam yesterday. It was nerve-wrecking for them, as expected. But they went through it. The experience itself was well worth it.
It was a "test", something quite foreign to them. It was Zern's first piano exam and Keane's second. Those rare "real" tests where performance was gauged only in those few minutes and not by how much you practised and prepared.
You know, the type of tests/exams that appear in your nightmares even when you're way beyond the age for taking exams. SL and I know, cos we still get those nightmares sometimes.
Why, oh, why then did we put them through tests? Friends from back home were lamenting how many "tests" and "exams" their kids have to go through and how much stress it places on the child.
Well, whether they passed or not, SL and I told them we would still go through it. For a very simple reason. Because life is full of tests and they, unlike their counterparts in Singapore, have had so little of it.
Their so-called "school exams" needed absolutely no preparation. Of course, they were asssessed on a regular basis and so the "exams", according to most international schools here, were just a continuation of regular assessment. Friends from Singapore, don't be too envious.
After all, think of when the kid enters higher education. Tests are a must. Imagine how she or he would feel, that sudden dawn of realisation that there comes a time when you and only you can sit for your own test. Nope, you cannot ask your teacher for help; Nope, you have to answer the questions whether you prepared for them or not, and Nope, test don't care if you're in a not-very-good-state-to-answer and nope, you're not allowed more time. And of course, you WILL be ranked against your classmates (or even against the whole cohort), whether you like or not.
There are many schools of thought about children sitting for tests or exams.
Well, this is what we figured: tests are here to stay; so might as well take some and get used to them while you can afford to fail.
Well done, K & Z. Papa and Mama are so proud of you.
It was a "test", something quite foreign to them. It was Zern's first piano exam and Keane's second. Those rare "real" tests where performance was gauged only in those few minutes and not by how much you practised and prepared.
You know, the type of tests/exams that appear in your nightmares even when you're way beyond the age for taking exams. SL and I know, cos we still get those nightmares sometimes.
Why, oh, why then did we put them through tests? Friends from back home were lamenting how many "tests" and "exams" their kids have to go through and how much stress it places on the child.
Well, whether they passed or not, SL and I told them we would still go through it. For a very simple reason. Because life is full of tests and they, unlike their counterparts in Singapore, have had so little of it.
Their so-called "school exams" needed absolutely no preparation. Of course, they were asssessed on a regular basis and so the "exams", according to most international schools here, were just a continuation of regular assessment. Friends from Singapore, don't be too envious.
After all, think of when the kid enters higher education. Tests are a must. Imagine how she or he would feel, that sudden dawn of realisation that there comes a time when you and only you can sit for your own test. Nope, you cannot ask your teacher for help; Nope, you have to answer the questions whether you prepared for them or not, and Nope, test don't care if you're in a not-very-good-state-to-answer and nope, you're not allowed more time. And of course, you WILL be ranked against your classmates (or even against the whole cohort), whether you like or not.
There are many schools of thought about children sitting for tests or exams.
Well, this is what we figured: tests are here to stay; so might as well take some and get used to them while you can afford to fail.
Well done, K & Z. Papa and Mama are so proud of you.
07 January 2009
Holiday shopping
Happy New Year, everyone!
The boys have been home the past two weeks and I find little time for sitting down to write. Finally, some time alone.
One of the things I eventually got down to recently was shopping, from home. I was in fact quite amazed by Taobao (淘宝), the biggest online shopping platform in China today. For those of you who have never been on it, here's the link: www.taobao.com.cn. It offers a huge array of stuff ranging from bags, shoes, clothes to household appliances, furniture and sports equipment. The list goes on.
Unlike back home where I've done some online shopping on an ad hoc basis, this is a marketplace that has payment and ratings systems quite unique to its own.
There is an intermediary (支付宝) which holds the buyer's money in escrow and the buyer has to authorise release of the cash to the seller only on receipt of the product. Quite essential in China, where direct online payment is still not highly trusted.
Also, you are prompted to rate the seller/buyer after each transaction, and these ratings are transparent to all. That is, I suppose, one way to check on each other's credibility. In fact, it's sort of a custom in online shopping here to chat online (阿里旺旺) with your seller and casually ask for discounts or waiver in delivery fees before you place your orders. I did the reverse at first...and learnt along the way.
Well, to the big question: what did I buy? Probably the most I have in such a short period of time. Shoes, clothes, cuff links (for Teo), baby clothes (for a relative...ahem, not me ok), scarf, oh and I am now helping my brother-in-law search for a good luggage bag.
I think this type of shopping appeals only to people like me, who hate entering shop after shop to look for a specific product. It also helps that delivery charges are typically minimal like 5-15 rmb. And the feeling of having your goods delivered to you is nice, especially since the winter is getting to be rather cold and wet nowadays.
Before anyone plunge into it, however, I would strongly advise scouring through more suppliers and starting small with lower value purchases. It's fun (if you don't mind taking a chance since you don't get to feel or try the stuff physically before buying) and it links you to suppliers from all over China.
Well, whatever form shopping takes for you, hope you find some good bargains.
The boys have been home the past two weeks and I find little time for sitting down to write. Finally, some time alone.
One of the things I eventually got down to recently was shopping, from home. I was in fact quite amazed by Taobao (淘宝), the biggest online shopping platform in China today. For those of you who have never been on it, here's the link: www.taobao.com.cn. It offers a huge array of stuff ranging from bags, shoes, clothes to household appliances, furniture and sports equipment. The list goes on.
Unlike back home where I've done some online shopping on an ad hoc basis, this is a marketplace that has payment and ratings systems quite unique to its own.
There is an intermediary (支付宝) which holds the buyer's money in escrow and the buyer has to authorise release of the cash to the seller only on receipt of the product. Quite essential in China, where direct online payment is still not highly trusted.
Also, you are prompted to rate the seller/buyer after each transaction, and these ratings are transparent to all. That is, I suppose, one way to check on each other's credibility. In fact, it's sort of a custom in online shopping here to chat online (阿里旺旺) with your seller and casually ask for discounts or waiver in delivery fees before you place your orders. I did the reverse at first...and learnt along the way.
Well, to the big question: what did I buy? Probably the most I have in such a short period of time. Shoes, clothes, cuff links (for Teo), baby clothes (for a relative...ahem, not me ok), scarf, oh and I am now helping my brother-in-law search for a good luggage bag.
I think this type of shopping appeals only to people like me, who hate entering shop after shop to look for a specific product. It also helps that delivery charges are typically minimal like 5-15 rmb. And the feeling of having your goods delivered to you is nice, especially since the winter is getting to be rather cold and wet nowadays.
Before anyone plunge into it, however, I would strongly advise scouring through more suppliers and starting small with lower value purchases. It's fun (if you don't mind taking a chance since you don't get to feel or try the stuff physically before buying) and it links you to suppliers from all over China.
Well, whatever form shopping takes for you, hope you find some good bargains.
25 December 2008
A Suzhou Christmas
Christmas is today but it felt like it happened a week ago.
Firstly, the boys already had their Christmas Concert a week ago and have been enjoying their Christmas break since then.
Also, our Suzhou extended family already had the Christmas gathering (cum gift exchange) more than a week ago. This was to make sure everyone could turn up. Almost everyone (except us) already made holiday plans and are now away from Suzhou.
The boys are really enjoying the presents, something they didn't have quite as much in Singapore. This was just a sample of the presents we received. So beautifully wrapped, aren't they?
We also did a little bit of decoration here and there around the house. And by some lovely concidence, our 
one remaining chilly fruit decided to turn to its true colour - RED! Even our red gloxinias bloomed. Red and green do make the house look more Christmasy.
So, here's wishing all our friends and family all the best things that money cannot buy....love, joy, peace and good health!
Ho Ho Ho....
01 December 2008
Kids on kids
We were having a discussion with Keane and Zern over dinner one day. The topic was whether they want to have children when they grow up.
Zern: Nope. Don't think so.
Us: Why?
Zern: Because I want to be an explorer when I grow up.
Us: Oh, so having children makes your job difficult.
Zern: (Nodding).
Us: But you know, you can teach your child all about digging and stuff.
Zern: Maybe.
Us: What about you Keane?
Keane (with devilish grin): Yes, I want children.
Us (secretly happy with the answer): Oh. Why?
Keane: So that I can control them.
Us: Like we control you guys now?
Keane (same devilish grin): Yes.
Zern: Nope. Don't think so.
Us: Why?
Zern: Because I want to be an explorer when I grow up.
Us: Oh, so having children makes your job difficult.
Zern: (Nodding).
Us: But you know, you can teach your child all about digging and stuff.
Zern: Maybe.
Us: What about you Keane?
Keane (with devilish grin): Yes, I want children.
Us (secretly happy with the answer): Oh. Why?
Keane: So that I can control them.
Us: Like we control you guys now?
Keane (same devilish grin): Yes.
24 November 2008
Going home
Just the other day, someone asked me,"Are you going home?" after a lesson at yoga. My immediate response was,"Yes, going home. Anything on after this?" Actually, what the other party was asking was,"Are you heading back Singapore for the hols?" We had a laugh over "home" as in "home", or "home" as in "hometown".
A slight breakdown in miscommunication? Or perhaps it's just that I have begun to see "home" differently. Not that Singapore is not my home; it will always be my home country. Just that "home" conjures up images of a place where you immediate loved ones are, where your everyday life revolves and that place, at least for now, is in Suzhou.
By some strange coincidence, SL shares the same sentiments the past week even though he was not in Suzhou. He's been in Singapore for a business meeting, finding time to indulge in his favourite meepok and nasi lemak, and swimming outdoors under the sun (not cold and indoors like in Suzhou) too.
While he enjoyed (some of) the comforts of familiarity from back home, he couldn't help but comment that he missed too the nice cool weather of Suzhou, the family (us of course!), and surprisingly, the sense that things can change and do change here in Suzhou. Singapore seemed so "boring", in comparison.
Indeed, home is where the heart is.
But, more so, home also has to evolve as the heart evolves.
A slight breakdown in miscommunication? Or perhaps it's just that I have begun to see "home" differently. Not that Singapore is not my home; it will always be my home country. Just that "home" conjures up images of a place where you immediate loved ones are, where your everyday life revolves and that place, at least for now, is in Suzhou.
By some strange coincidence, SL shares the same sentiments the past week even though he was not in Suzhou. He's been in Singapore for a business meeting, finding time to indulge in his favourite meepok and nasi lemak, and swimming outdoors under the sun (not cold and indoors like in Suzhou) too.
While he enjoyed (some of) the comforts of familiarity from back home, he couldn't help but comment that he missed too the nice cool weather of Suzhou, the family (us of course!), and surprisingly, the sense that things can change and do change here in Suzhou. Singapore seemed so "boring", in comparison.
Indeed, home is where the heart is.
But, more so, home also has to evolve as the heart evolves.
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